Was talkin' trash while chompin' on mah favorite snack, stale beef jerky 'n chewin' tobacco, with my friend Larry the other day, and told him 'bout this here highfalutin' Ree-union. He said, "Why Aaalbeert, I'll git ya this thing pro-moted, jes' promise me mah own personal beer keg 'case I show up - make it Bud."
Ya got it, Larry. Now, emote and PROMOTE!
Larry sez: "Git-R-Done!" Meaning: Please go to the ILS web site and purchase them darn tickets for the Friday social - be neighborly 'n sociable, heah? Click here with your mouse, rat, raccoon, or possum - whatever works fer ye, and git 'em. Purty please?
Promise we won't even make ya eat grits as a condition for attending the sociable social, but they're not bad. Even some Yankees like 'em! Even some who hail from Havana like 'em!
Disclaimer: This is not a paid political announcement. Larry The Cable Guy does not approve this message. The blog commando does not really know Larry The Cable Guy and makes no claim to friendship or kinship with him, unless perhaps there is some remote kinship via his - the blogger classmate's - Better Half's Nawth Cahlina kin. All things are possible. This is hyperbole of the Worst Kind with the goal of making y'all take notice and get yourselves to this here Reunion. It is marketing at its worst. Larry The Cable Guy neither endorses nor approves this message, and is not responsible for its contents. The writer is not responsible either. But then, y'all knew that. He's just certified nuts. And his Southern Accent is in fact atrocious. Think Desi Arnaz tryin' to speak like...Larry The Cable Guy.
Not just Larry and I, but Gang of 4.5 member Mistah Urbizu - Larry, by the way, wants to know: "What the heyul is an Ooorbeezoo?" - never mind, Larry - gently prods you to do the right thing, as he so eloquently expresses it in a recent email:
"Buy your tickets (only a measly $20 a piece) at the ILS alumni website. No excuses!!! Remember, we know where you live." Do you really, Bill? Yer a regular Sherlock Holmes, ya are! Actually, with Google Earth and similar spy tools, we DO know where you live...
In fairness, jes' a gentle reminder to the Infernal Ree-Union Committee types - didja git yer tickets? What'ya waitin' fer, varmints!? Git out yer "plaastique" money and do dah deed - NO, the good folk at LaSalle don' take no Confederate currency. Hmmm...that don't sound right...lessee, two negatives make a positive, rat? Positively! Jes' pay with the darn credit card - it'll be a credit to yer character. Gotta set a good example instead of jus' settin' on yer...posterior.
Besides showing up for the sociable social gathering the Friday, ya gotta make the picnic at Crandon on Saturday. Some have made extraordinary, one could even say paranormal efforts on your behalf, to ensure we all have a nice, cozy, exclusive place in which to gather together.
Yours truly has been holding the fort for you at Crandon, since July 1958! With Miami Police backup no less, and a fine six-shooter...plus a Cuban chaperone to look after the ladies. How much more friendship, camaraderie, affection, honor, duty, determination, courtesy and consideration do you want? I just knew we were gonna need this spot for our special day half a century down the road, so there you are! Rather, there I was - or my doppelgänger, in any case.
Be sure you don't fergit to bring yer vittles to this here picnic place. You have plenty o' time to plan yer culinary-that's a faaancy word-adventures. The blog commando is pretty sure what he's providin' fer his famelee's pleasure; the Nawth Cahlina Missus should approve - ain't this the makings fer a fine country dish, which friend Larry would also find a mighty tasty thang, nicely done on the grill?
And rat in our own backyard! Who sez Boca Ray-ton ain't got no classy cuisine - there's another faaancy word agin'! Git da shotgun, Larry - and the Barbie-Q sauce - "Git-R-Done!"
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